What it means to lose someone

My grandad recently passed away, he has left a hole in all our lives.  My grandparents were married for 57 years, the thought of even getting married terrifies me.  Growing and maintaining a love that lasts for 57 years is an incredible achievement which I am totally in awe of.  But even more unimaginable to me is how it must feel to lose that person after so long.  So much love, so many memories, so much time, so much of you that is tied up in them.  I cant imagine that your life would ever feel the same again.  And yet, to have something that is so precious must be worth the pain of losing it ten thousand times over.

I honestly believe that a lifetime of love is all we really desire.  We may deny it, reject it, hide from it...but it doesnt change how much we need it.  We can surround ourselves with other worldy objects or emotions, but it is the transcendent nature of pure love that we hunger for.  It is only necessarily to momentarily detach ourselves from the incessant clamour that is our everyday consumer-driven lives to realise what it is we truly need.

My biggest regret is that I didnt learn this lesson a little sooner.  Even with the beautiful and simple example of my grandparent's marriage right in front of me, I still couldnt see how important it is to strive for a lifetime of love.  As usual, I insist upon making my own mistakes though... one day I might even learn my lesson... who knows!

"You have no idea how hard it is to live out a great romance." ~Wallis Simpson


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